One of the cliches of the SF/F world is that one is expected to complain that during panel discussions, audience members will sometimes offer up comments rather than questions to the panelists. Audience members should only ask questions it seems because of...well, fifteen years later, I still don't know. Not every expert is on every panel, so it stands to reason that some experts will be in the audience and may wish to contribute. Further, lots of panelists are idiots and say all sorts of stupid things, so with a bar that low, why discriminate against people who simply weren't assigned a particular panel. Among the genius comments I've heard from panelists over the last few years:
Lovecraft was an anti-racist writer—it doesn't matter whether you were white black yellow or strip-ed (yes, pronounced strip-ED), when the Old Ones come to eat you. Also he wrote about Maine, where he was from.
Invisible ink. Maybe that's magical realism.
If you don't have an agent, just get a patent attorney to handle your contracts with publishers. And be sure to give away plenty of stories for free on the Internet, like I do with the Huffington Post.
Criticizing Wall Street is anti-Semitic.
When I think about literary fiction, I think about A Stranger in a Strange Land—I still have sex with my water brothers forty years later. That's the power of literary fiction.
I know this is a panel about the best fiction of the last year, but I really haven't read anything this year. Well, maybe Sookie Stackhouse? When did that come out? *takes out knitting* *later, answers her cell phone and confirms a lunch date while on panel*
Panelist A: *recites Heinlein's rules of writing*
Panelist B: Well, those are good rules, but here are MY rules for writing! *recites Heinlein's rules of writing*
We shouldn't discuss "Western" civilization as that is a racist term; there is no other kind of civilization in the strictest sense. There's just civilization, and various savageries and despotisms.
I cannot sit down at my computer and check my email without being bombarded by solicitations to buy real snuff films!
A poll of young teenage boys showed that many of them don't like performing cunnilingus. This is the sort of social issue I've dedicated my life to solving.
We all agree that humanity can be improved, and we shouldn't let Hitler and his legacy interfere with my wish to have genetically superior children.
One day psychology will be a real science and we can use it to eliminate all the negative traits that stand in the way of utopia. Sure, in the past this idea has been used to oppress people, but there have only been a handful of societies with psychology, and that's too small a sample to draw any conclusions.
Both major political parties are slaves to the environmentalist movement.
People don't read online fiction magazines, because everyone knows you can't get something for nothing. Anyway, about my online non-fiction magazine, which is totally FREE to read...
And to be clear, I've heard these comments are everyday regional cons such as Arisia and Capclave and Icon (Stony Brook), at supposedly superior cons like Wiscon and Readercon, and at great big cons such as Worldcon. Panelists are just as dumb as audience members.
Lovecraft was an anti-racist writer—it doesn't matter whether you were white black yellow or strip-ed (yes, pronounced strip-ED), when the Old Ones come to eat you. Also he wrote about Maine, where he was from.
Invisible ink. Maybe that's magical realism.
If you don't have an agent, just get a patent attorney to handle your contracts with publishers. And be sure to give away plenty of stories for free on the Internet, like I do with the Huffington Post.
Criticizing Wall Street is anti-Semitic.
When I think about literary fiction, I think about A Stranger in a Strange Land—I still have sex with my water brothers forty years later. That's the power of literary fiction.
I know this is a panel about the best fiction of the last year, but I really haven't read anything this year. Well, maybe Sookie Stackhouse? When did that come out? *takes out knitting* *later, answers her cell phone and confirms a lunch date while on panel*
Panelist A: *recites Heinlein's rules of writing*
Panelist B: Well, those are good rules, but here are MY rules for writing! *recites Heinlein's rules of writing*
We shouldn't discuss "Western" civilization as that is a racist term; there is no other kind of civilization in the strictest sense. There's just civilization, and various savageries and despotisms.
I cannot sit down at my computer and check my email without being bombarded by solicitations to buy real snuff films!
A poll of young teenage boys showed that many of them don't like performing cunnilingus. This is the sort of social issue I've dedicated my life to solving.
We all agree that humanity can be improved, and we shouldn't let Hitler and his legacy interfere with my wish to have genetically superior children.
One day psychology will be a real science and we can use it to eliminate all the negative traits that stand in the way of utopia. Sure, in the past this idea has been used to oppress people, but there have only been a handful of societies with psychology, and that's too small a sample to draw any conclusions.
Both major political parties are slaves to the environmentalist movement.
People don't read online fiction magazines, because everyone knows you can't get something for nothing. Anyway, about my online non-fiction magazine, which is totally FREE to read...
And to be clear, I've heard these comments are everyday regional cons such as Arisia and Capclave and Icon (Stony Brook), at supposedly superior cons like Wiscon and Readercon, and at great big cons such as Worldcon. Panelists are just as dumb as audience members.